There was a guy named Dave who had been telling everyone for years that he was sitting on a goldmine of Bitcoin, bought back when it was cheap. He wouldn’t stop bragging at parties, telling friends, “Just wait, one day I’ll be a millionaire. Bitcoin’s going to the moon!”
One day, Dave woke up and saw that Bitcoin had hit an all-time high. He decided, “Today’s the day I cash out and retire!” Excited, he fired up his old laptop where he kept his wallet. The thing was so old, it sounded like a jet engine starting up.
After what felt like forever, the computer finally loaded, but Dave couldn’t remember his password. He tried everything—his dog’s name, his birthday, “password123”—nothing worked. Slowly, the realization dawned: he’d stored his password in an old phone… which he had thrown out years ago because it was “too slow.”
Panic set in. He even tried hypnosis to remember his password, hoping his subconscious would reveal the treasure. No luck.
Eventually, Dave gave up, figuring he’d forever lost his fortune. A few weeks later, he checked Bitcoin’s price again and saw it had plummeted. He thought, “Well, at least I didn’t lose out on much.”
Then, just as he was scrolling Twitter, his laptop made a loud ping! Turns out, it had saved his password in a random text file on his desktop. He’d been locked out for no reason the whole time!
But by the time he logged in, Bitcoin had crashed. Instead of millions, he could barely buy himself a decent lunch.
